"We wear like 80 percent of the same things," Alec complained. He considered. "I knew it wasn't real. But I also knew that what he felt for the other people he'd lost WAS real. And I knew what it was like to feel like that for him, and who he was, so it was ... really easy to start feeling that way again. But knowing he felt so MUCH for people who came before me, and how special they were to him - I pretty much just assumed that he would never feel as much for me. I tried to talk him out of telling me he loved me when he did because of that."
Alec laughed, cheeks a little pink as Jace missed what he'd been hinting at again. But he let it go this time. "He sent me a video that was meant for Magnus on accident, but we talked for a while. You can flirt with whoever you want, Jace. He's not going to mind." He hesitated and then added carefully. "Even if that's Izzy, too."
"He didn't think you'd make me choose. He just ... thought I wouldn't need him, maybe," Alec said.
That single phrase had a lot of meaning to it and Alec watched Jace, a little uncertain but more confident that he understood where Jace was coming from now - it wasn't far from what John had gotten upset about, what Alec assumed with Magnus and George. "Magnus is ... my touchstone here. My rock. He helped me find my way and find myself and I love him. John is ... who I found all on my own. Someone that wouldn't have been at home, that maybe doesn't make sense if you'd met the two of us before, but who makes me happy and I make him happy. I think I'm better at being a person, better for everyone, to everyone, because of loving Magnus, because of loving John. But you're the other half of me, Jace. We already share a soul and a bond and a mark. I wouldn't be ... I don't know who I'd be without you, but probably more uptight than I already was, for sure. I'm only a person at all it feels like because I love you and was your parabatai."
Alec reached for the tray, moving it aside to set on the nightstand, and then just caught Jace by the wrist and yanked him closer and kissed him. "Don't overthink, that's my job."
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Alec laughed, cheeks a little pink as Jace missed what he'd been hinting at again. But he let it go this time. "He sent me a video that was meant for Magnus on accident, but we talked for a while. You can flirt with whoever you want, Jace. He's not going to mind." He hesitated and then added carefully. "Even if that's Izzy, too."
"He didn't think you'd make me choose. He just ... thought I wouldn't need him, maybe," Alec said.
That single phrase had a lot of meaning to it and Alec watched Jace, a little uncertain but more confident that he understood where Jace was coming from now - it wasn't far from what John had gotten upset about, what Alec assumed with Magnus and George. "Magnus is ... my touchstone here. My rock. He helped me find my way and find myself and I love him. John is ... who I found all on my own. Someone that wouldn't have been at home, that maybe doesn't make sense if you'd met the two of us before, but who makes me happy and I make him happy. I think I'm better at being a person, better for everyone, to everyone, because of loving Magnus, because of loving John. But you're the other half of me, Jace. We already share a soul and a bond and a mark. I wouldn't be ... I don't know who I'd be without you, but probably more uptight than I already was, for sure. I'm only a person at all it feels like because I love you and was your parabatai."
Alec reached for the tray, moving it aside to set on the nightstand, and then just caught Jace by the wrist and yanked him closer and kissed him. "Don't overthink, that's my job."